Living as a Hypocrite

I walked into that beautiful church with a heavy heart. It was my year of living at home after college and my life seemed "out of control." It wasn't, of course, but it was a really difficult season for me. I'd graduated college in Michigan without a job and moved home to North Carolina because it was my only option. I didn't grow up there, so I didn't have any friends or social connections. On top of my feelings of worthlessness, exclusion, and instability I was also hitting an emotional low with my personal relationships. I was caught in sin, caught in my ego, caught in the same patterns of selfishness and hurting others. And the guilt was unbearable.

I was going to St. Pius X parish almost an hour before mass in order to go to Confession. I'd reached a point, as we all do, of seeing clearly my sin and spiritual failures but feeling helpless to really change, to leave it behind and move forward. After all, I've done this all before, the cycle of sin, conviction, repentence, confession, absolution, determination, lukewarmness (or maybe just absentmindedness), and back to sin. The true beauty, the only beauty of Christianity, is grace. But how do I get there? I at least knew that the confessional was a good start.

I walked into that gigantic church feeling the typical sense of shame one does before approaching God and asking for mercy. The church was almost empty except for the sacristan and a few others mulling around. I wandered over to the confessional at the side of the sanctuary and saw there was no waiting line. I thought I probably had the wrong time. But after sheepishly poking my head into the confessional the priest on the other side beckoned me to come in. I knelt down and began.

When I was done this priest, who I could tell was fairly advanced in years, gave me the greatest comfort I could have asked for.

"God is Love."

I no longer remember what else he said before giving me absolution but just that simple phrase, one I've heard a thousand times, was exactly what I needed.

Confession, also known as the Sacrament of Reconciliation, is by far my favorite sacrament. You want to experience God's love, God's grace? You'll get more here than you know what to with! I like to critique a lot of what Catholics do but by God, we get it right with Confession!

I think the love I felt through the words of the priest and the hope I had leaving sin behind were the real takeaways that day. And really any day you confess your failings before God. Anything and everything a priest will say in the confessional can be summed up by my confessor's words, "God is Love."

It's so odd that we have to be constantly reminded of this. There are times when I can feel like a real hypocrite who professes a desire to live one way and then constantly fails and chooses something else. Are we hypocrites? Are we living a dual life? Yes. Absolutely. But that is the human experience. That is the spiritual life. It's struggle and pain and imperfection. But it doesn't invalidate the beauty, the serenity, the perfect that we do find and are graced to live.

After confession that day, I waited for the other parishioners to arrive and mass to start. The priest from the confessional said mass and gave a homily. He talked about how he was a retired bishop, and how he had spent the better part of his younger days as a priest abroad in India. Calcutta, India. Hearing the sins of a tiny nun. This man had spent the better part of his priesthood as Mother Teresa's confessor. And here he was, an hour before, hearing my own confession. If I didn't feel God's love and providence before, I sure felt it then.

The point I'm trying to express is that we are forced by necessity to live with our natures and our propensity to sin and yet be offered freedom from sin. And just because we fall back into the false self and sin doesn't mean we are worthless. It's a lesson I think every Christian has learned time and again but still needs to hear. Like the creed, we need to say it over and over, plumbing its depths for deeper meaning. It's a lesson I've been lucky enough to hear not only from Mother Teresa's confessor but plenty of other priests along the way.

One thing I hope is helpful is to pass on words of comfort for the sinner. I wish I had a lot of wisdom here. But thankfully others have had that wisdom, which I offer to you. The following is some of the best advice I've been given in the intimacy of Confession over the years. Each should be savored and contemplated.


Pray for recognition of goodness. Pray for recognition of beauty and joy.
Pray for the gifts of the Holy Spirit - fortitude, wisdom, understanding, strength.

Our emotions should be listened to. They tell us something about what is true.

Take time to reflect on your feelings - Why do I not like this person? Why am I annoyed? What do I find this person attractive? What do I find admirable about them?

A sin has to be very serious to be a mortal sin. Give yourself a break.
Let the memories and moments of consolation carry you through the moments of desolation. (Let the 'highs' carry you through the 'lows' in your spiritual life.)

Your sin doesn't define you. You don't have to wait for all parts of your life to be holy in order to grow closer to God.
Above all, know that you are loved.

Two Brothers: On Violence, America, and One Month after Boston

My brother and I are close. Though we're fairly different we still can communicate on the same ground. I'm a social media marketer and religious, Jonah is a writer and editor for a national magazine and may be best described as quasi-religious. But when the news of the attacks in Boston came, we both saw it as an issue of great moment.

We, like everyone else, were left with questions of meaning - What does this mean for our country, for me, for the culture, for peace, for Americans, and for violence elsewhere that goes unnoticed? The following is an edited version of the email exchange I had with my brother in the wake of Boston, in which we discussed blind nationalism, the problem of violence, and how we should respond to these types of tragedies.

Sam: Whenever things like this happen, it is sad but it always makes me critical of our culture. I think the most interesting things were the comments I saw on social media of sympathy, Amero-religiosity, and the lack of attention to violence elsewhere, like Chicago and Guantanamo. Aren't these a problem? Where is our attention and outrage for the huge problems of violence we already have?

Jonah: What makes Boston so bad is the immediacy of it. Who didn't know someone in Boston or from Boston or who was running in Boston? I knew a runner. She crossed the finish line 20 minutes before the bombs went off. And to see the images—they look like a street I could walk down.

Many Americans, and I include myself here, only care about this type of thing when it hits home, so to speak. Oklahoma City. 9/11. Now Boston. Our compassion has a limit, apparently, and it's the United States border. Sure, plenty of people are aware of the horrible violence in Syria, in the Congo, in Guantanamo, in Mexico. But you don't see that type of outpouring of sympathy and support when Syrian troops use rape as a tool of war, for example. I just wish we also felt empathy beyond our borders.

Here's an interesting perspective on what America does and needs to do by Cord Jefferson. He argues that what Americans really need is true courage, which by all accounts we don't really have.

Sam: Jefferson's article asks a lot. It asks for a sort of collective sacrifice and elevation of the communal good that, honestly, Americans seem incapable of embracing post-WWII. It's true to say that we cannot live in fear and this is how we, as a people, triumph. But are people really willing to reject their fears in favor of bravery that is collectively good but makes one personally vulnerable? I'm willing to make that kind of sacrifice. Maybe you are too. But how many can we expect to join us?

We have a sense of nationalism. No one questions that. But it's rare that the goodness of that comes out. Jefferson wants a nation of Gaius Muciuses - the Roman youth who willingly held his hand in the fire in order to prove to an enemy general that Romans care nothing for their bodies, and everything for glory (and Rome and defeating those who endanger them). What a country we would be! But our individualism is too enmeshed. We're too post-Enlightenment. We're autonomous now, and Jefferson is really asking us to reverse that. Maybe we should but it will take more than an editorial to undo at least 200 years of encouragement in that direction.

But I still want to argue that it's our stupidity, prejudice, and selfishness that makes us take note of something like Boston and ignore something like Guantanamo Bay. Injustice was done to us by someone else? How dare they! Systematic, public, government-sanctioned injustice is done by us to others? Ugh...we're tired of hearing about it. That's the mentality and it's a much more troubling one than having a fear of terrorists.

We ignore the regular gun violence in Chicago because it's like Africa: we expect bad things to take place there (and it's mostly happening to a different race). And I throw myself in this boat too. I don't watch or read the news just to stay up on every shooting and the problems of the poor nationwide, let alone in this city or my community. So I'm not really any better. I guess I'm just trying to say that we should be ashamed of the degree to which we ignore the systematic problems of violence around us. Jefferson was right - at the end of that horrific day in Boston, only a handful of people died. Gun violence in our country and what we're doing abroad, like drone strikes in Pakistan, make that death toll seem insignificant.

Jonah: Bravery. That's a term that's been kicked around a lot, lately. The kind required in this situation, I think, is not the hand-in-the-fire kind, though that has its time and place (Birmingham, 1963; Guantanamo, present-time). It's bravery to face the world as it is.

The world is a violent place. Be it domestic violence against women, the Boston bombings, drone strikes that mistakenly kill a dozen innocent people, or the United States' torture campaign over the past decade. So there's a bravery required just to wake up and live in that every day. It's not brave to tackle someone just because they're vaguely foreign. That's cowardly. I think that's what Jefferson is getting at. It's not brave to pull Arabic speakers off a plane because they speak Arabic. We have to learn to say: "You know what, there are crazy people in the world who will do crazy things—bombings, shootings, other stupid shit. But, I believe that most of us are good. And I will be one of those good people and do everything I can to make the world a good place." That's brave. That's what those people who ran toward the explosion displayed.

But that bravery can't be limited to only what's in front of our eyes. And this is what I think is the truly brave part. It has to extend beyond our experience.  In 1958, Martin Luther King Jr. said: Hate begets hate; violence begets violence; toughness begets a greater toughness. We must meet the forces of hate with the power of love. This is what Jesus was getting at with the Turn the other cheek. We have a choice. We can respond to these types of things violently. But throughout history, that's only prompted more violence. William Stafford wrote a book called "Every War Has Two Losers." You can't win a war. You can't end terrorism with violence. What you can do is try help those who need it—whether it's someone bleeding next to a detonated bomb, or a group of people across the world who need a school and a clinic, or a group of people being forcefully detained for a decade. That's what bravery is: Doing the right thing without knowing whether you'll be rewarded or injured for doing so.

Sam: I think we're exactly on the same page with how we think Americans should act and respond. Sometimes it's really curious that people don't see the common threads in what are universally recognized do-gooders in the best and literal sense of the word. MLK, Ghandi, Mother Teresa, they're all preaching the same principles and they're the people we admire most, the ones we think were "great" and got it right. But there's a strange disconnect. Our society doesn't say you should strive to be a certain type of person like MLK or Ghandi. Our society says you should be whatever type of person you want and even though we have other characteristics we collectively prize, they tend to be culturally specific.

We say that MLK was one of the greatest Americans ever and yet what American would ever admire a president who said, "we need to not chase these wrongdoers to the ends of the earth but rather forgive them and be at peace"? Preposterous! We'd look weak. And strength (read power) is really the greatest of American virtues.

Jonah: I think it goes back to empathy. "No man is an island" said John Donne. Neither is the United States. Which is evident when you look at the response from other countries after 9/11, or even after the Boston marathon. And sure, there are "Free Tibet" and "Save Darfur" stickers on Subarus and Priuses across the country. But there's rarely a collective sense of compassion for people outside of our country. Not for Syria, not for the London tube bombings in 2005, not even for people in poverty or lacking basic necessities. Why? I don't know. I'm guilty of the same thing. I care far more about buying a new pair of skis than I do about donating that same amount to Food not Bombs or Medicins Sans Frontieres. I'll often feel superior merely because I'm aware of a "situation" in another country, but I don't write letters to congressmen, I don't donate. Maybe the reason is: my life is good. I could spend time trying to understand an issue and understand what kind of sacrifice (I use the term lightly) I could make to help a situation, or I could spend it having a BBQ with my friends. I prefer the latter every time.

If there's a solution to that, it's beyond me. But I think MLK and John Lennon and William Stafford and Jesus were all onto the start of it (and I'm going to sound like a total liberal hippy here). It's love. It's love that births empathy. Because we can imagine our own children starving/dying/hurting, we can imagine others' suffering. And that's a start. The world is full of evil, hateful, and crazy people. There's no stopping that. But like Cormac McCarthy wrote, "You have to carry the fire."

Sam: Yeah, I think I really agree with your reasons. It helps explain why we have isolated empathy. (And who knows, maybe people in other countries feel the same way.) If there's any hope for us, it does lie with Love. I think we have the potential to "carry the fire" both individually and as a nation. But it takes being drawn out of ourselves and into true love. That's a very freeing process and it's why truly selfless people never seem to mind being selfless. But are we ready for that process? Do we desire it? Do I? And where can our empathy go so that we aren't ignorant of the world's problems but are directing our efforts to specific areas where we can do good?

It's really the age-old universal problem of human existence - choosing others over ourselves, ideals above wants, and truth over the ego. I'm just not certain we'll ever communally find the answer of Love as a response to violence. One month after Boston, are we any wiser?

Why I Really Became Catholic

In conversations this past week it was rightly pointed out that last week's post on Why I Became Catholic helped clarify why I was attracted to traditional Christianity but not why I chose Catholicism specifically. What was it about Roman Catholicism that made me say, "Yes! Here is something true that I've found nowhere else"?

If I had to do it over, I would retitle last week's post "Why I left Evangelicalism." I'd like to say for the record that I believe there is a lot of good in Protestant and Evangelical traditions. In fact, I feel part of my personal mission as a Catholic convert is to help Catholics see where we can learn from our Protestant brothers and sisters. But I did reject a lot of tenets in Evangelicalism as I experienced it growing up. And the specifically 'Catholic' things I found in Catholicism were so overwhelmingly good for me to know.


Some reasons I chose Catholicism specifically

The Papacy - I really think it's hard to consider "Catholicism" outside of the figure of the pope. As I was saying to someone recently, the pope is the linchpin that holds Catholicism together as a unified, trustworthy belief system.

A fundamental problem for Protestantism, in my experience, is authority. Why is one denomination more valid than another? How can I trust one interpretation over another? It seems this requires the answers of "my pastor says, the denomination believes, our translation, the King's version, scholars note," and on and on. I didn't find those answers definitive or personally satisfying. But in Catholicism, there is a clear hierarchy of authority. Because Catholics believe Christ instituted the papacy personally with Peter (Matthew 16:17-19), when we're asked "How can you believe X?" we can answer "Because the pope, Christ's representative on earth, said so." Now, that makes a lot of people uncomfortable. But when I looked at Scripture and the tradition of the Church, I found the papacy to actually be a great comfort. Theologically, it's a form of assurance.

Vision of Mary - What would a Catholic blog really be without a mention of Mary?? I hope to do a future post on Mariology 101. But unlike the vast majority of reasons I did join the Church, this reason was not logical but experiential. I offer this story as my own experience, and I make no demands for belief one way or another.

"Mary" was something I was just not on board with when I converted. I didn't understand the Catholic belief here (and a ton of other places, let me tell you) but I was given the grace to simply accept that understanding would come with time.

A couple weeks before joining the Church I was growing extremely anxious. Is this the right choice? What if I get it wrong? I really didn't know if I should 'go through with it' and become Catholic. So I went for a walk around campus to pray, and I desperately asked God for a sign. Of course, this is really immature spirituality but it was all I really had at the time. And God had enough mercy to give me what I hoped for.

As I was walking I looked up and stared at a very large oak tree with the sun shining directly behind it. After a few seconds of taking in the beauty of its leaves, I closed my eyes. And there, in my now (non)vision, the sun shining through the leaves had burned a perfect - I mean absolutely perfect - image of Mary. It was unmistakable. Please feel free to be a skeptic. I normally discount such stories myself as wishful thinking. But it was a true experience for me (the only person it was meant to be true for), and I took it as a sign that I really should become Catholic. I've never looked back.

Salvation - I found a lot more history, tradition, theology, and Scripture validating a Catholic understanding of salvation rather than a Protestant one. The world is both physical and spiritual. They go together. And so a view of sacramental grace just made a lot of sense.

Works and action being part of our salvation was also an important belief for me. Christ rarely tells his disciples what to believe (though it's often revealed to them) but he always tells them to do something: follow me. Other times he denounces those with the proper confession but wrong action and affirms those with the wrong profession but the right action. The Catholic view of faith and works affirmed what I felt experientially was true.

Salvation is a process in Catholicism. Protestants tend to view it as an event, which explains why they always want to know when you were saved. But Catholics believe salvation is a constant process of growing in holiness, of uncertainty, and of much stumbling. And, if you're not careful, you could possibly lose your salvation altogether in extreme cases. I think this is a much more difficult view of salvation to live with but I do think it's the right one.

Why I Became Catholic

I joined the Catholic Church from a Baptist and Pentecostal background during college, Easter Sunday 2007. Lots of Catholics leave the Church but not many Protestants come in, particularly if they're not marrying a Catholic.

So I'm often asked why I became Catholic, especially living in Wheaton where Catholics are few. This is kind of like being asked, "What makes you you?" We can do our best to give a nod to nature, nurture, and choice but we'll never be able to fully explore it.

That's true for me with my conversion and I'm discovering new 'reasons' all the time. And I acknowledge that accepting Catholicism was also a rejection of a lot of the Protestantism of my childhood. That being said, here are 3 main reasons I became Catholic.


1. The marriage of Faith & Reason. Many Christians still hold that scientific evidence isn't trustworthy since the Bible doesn't mention things like evolution. But Pope Benedict XVI said that faith and reason are never at odds. If you think they are, you're misunderstanding at least one of them.

The natural world and its laws are part of God's creation so how can we reject part of God? Let me quote Godspell's character, Galileo in saying,

When it comes to God, I find
I can't believe that he designed
a human being with a mind
he's not supposed to use.

As a young man in college desiring an honest faith, I needed to hear that.

2. Continuity with the past. Growing up in my Protestant church(es) I had the sense that 'true' Christianity came about with Martin Luther and the Reformation. The Early Church, of course, had it right and was perfect until corrupted by Catholicism (insert dramatic music here).

So many Protestants are left with at least a thousand year gap in which there were basically no 'true' Christians. But how could God allow that to happen?

J.R.R. Tolkien once described a mustard seed. It grows and changes over time and the grown tree looks nothing like the original seed because it's not meant to. This is the Catholic Church, he says.

No, there weren't titles like "pope" in 1st century Mesopotamia but these developments are okay and part of God's providence. God uses human agency. And logically, it made much more sense to me that God was always guiding the official teaching of the Church.

There was no thousand year gap of corruption. I accepted that God was there all along and the Holy Spirit has guided the development of Christianity at all times.

3. The emphases in Catholicism seemed truer. I don't wish to anger any Protestants but I really have issues with some emphases in Protestantism. They tend to be less focused on community and looking out and much more focused on the self and looking in. (Catholics, of course, have the opposite problem.)

A perfect example is the individualism found in many Protestant circles. It's just so American(!) and tends to give the gospel an American flavor, which I just don't like.

You get hints of this individualism in some Protestant language. "Have you read your  Bible?" "I  don't like the music at that church." "Jesus is my personal  Lord and Savior." No, he's not! Jesus is the savior of the World!

I think Protestants (and really all of us) can be so focused on our own faith life that we forget everyone else. I think this plays out in things like "church shopping", a phrase I'm convinced can only lead one to conclude that finding a church that suits you is the same as finding flattering pants for your body type.

I found in Catholicism an emphasis on action and not just faith. An emphasis on caring for the poor in all their forms. And I found a primacy of community over the individual.

In Catholicism I heard, for the first time, that we are meant to fit the Church (like a good pair of pants), and not the other way around. That still rings true to me.

Update: After receiving feedback from several individuals, I decided to clarify my reasons for converting and to offer "specifically Catholic" reasons for choosing Catholicism. Thanks to those who gave me feedback. And you can find Part 2 of this post here.

Your Notion of "Dating" is Out-Dated

We've come a long way since the Sabine women and the need to literally capture a mate. When it comes to contemporary ideas of "right" or "traditional" dating though, we don't seem that far removed from the medieval notions of match-making, let alone Victorian era gender roles.

I'm not an historian or a dating expert but can't we agree that a lot of our customs just don't make sense with our current and very good notions of gender equality?


I've Got the Power

As a male, I know that certain things are expected of us men on dates - anything from holding open a door to "pursuing" the woman to paying for the date. I can't speak from the women's perspective so I won't. But I have issues with this script.

First, this isn't the 1950s. Men solely paying for dates makes a lot of sense when they're the only gender making an income! Or when their income is enough to support a whole family. Neither of those is true today. Men aren't the only ones working and salaries for both genders generally aren't enough to support a nonworking spouse and any children. I don't mind paying for dates, really. But the expectation that this is the realm of the man is just as outdated as girdles. Maybe even more so since we still have Spanx.

I also have a distaste for guys feeling the need to be the pursuer. A lot of men feel emasculated if they're asked out or bought dinner, and the only reason is they don't feel in control or that they're "wearing the pants" (read "have the power"). A lot of our dating rules seem to be about delegating power to the proper gender, and it's just ridiculously stupid. And downright unhealthy often enough. If you truly can't see gender equality and still feel you need power as a man or need to give it up as a woman, then I honestly don't think your imaging God who is true Masculinity and true Femininity. God isn't concerned with power games.

The last power complaint is women being treated as property. We like to replace "property" with words like "proper" (how very close it is!) or "respectful." Asking for a father's permission may be seen as respectful but it's also pretty outdated. My parents loved us boys just as much as my sister and they don't feel the need to vet girlfriends (or, to their credit, boyfriends in my sister's case). If you're a minor, parental permission makes sense. If an adult, again, it's about a male having power over you, which I just can't understand.


So where to go from here?

Yeah, I clearly don't know the answer. But I know I make it a point to say upfront to people I date that I'm a feminist and that I believe in equality. Relevant to this topic, that takes the form of sharing expenses - usually whoever proposes the date pays. It also means letting go of the reigns. I pursue someone when I like them. I've had women pursue me too, and I gotta say, I'm a fan. If it's not about my ego, which I hope it isn't, then what do I care if someone is up front about liking me? I still do some traditional things in dating but it's because they're my preference and not because they meet some objective standard.

I'll also say, if you just happen to like traditional dating, that's great! Nothing wrong with that. If you like having doors held open for you and being pursued and a lot of other traditional things, more power to you. It's not a problem at all to want to be dated in a certain way. The problem is when you feel, by virtue of your gender, that you're entitled to certain behavior from a dating partner or that dating has to happen a certain way. It doesn't. But we should all know our own preferences, and who cares if yours is traditional?

I'd say that however you feel about dating, be aware that traditional and nontraditional expectations in dating carry with them a philosophy of power and importance distributed between the two of you. I'm uncomfortable having most of the power (as the male pursuer) and hoping that if I ever tie the knot with someone, our mindset will radically be changed to seeing each other as equals. That's unrealistic, and I think the way you date is probably the way you'll see a spouse. Make sure it's a healthy path.

Where is God - the Right or the Left?

I converted to Catholicism just over 6 years ago. It's a long time; I know because my faith has changed. I'm just as Catholic as ever (which was "a lot" when I joined the Church, believe you me) but I view Catholicism and my place in it very differently.

I can't generalize my experience to all converts, let alone Christians, but I think I can speak with some authority based on my own experience and that of other converts I know. When you're converted, for many of us, you want to dive in completely. You want that full body, full spirit immersion as a way of breaking with your old life and feeling a more drastic change to a new one. This is normal! And it's good. Often converts, though they may miss some of the subculture, tend to learn more about and be more devoted to Catholicism than cradle Catholics precisely because they're so hungry for that immersion!

The point is that when you convert, you commit to it fully and you want to lose yourself in it. What a great feeling that God can use toward our good! But there is a danger as well, and I think most converts fall into it. They become, not just Catholic or Christian or whatever tradition you're addressing, but soldiers. They become good boys and girls who step in line and carry the flag: rule-following, legalistic, zealous, righteous, fully committed, and willing to take up arms against any and all threats. (Not literal weapons, mind you, though maybe in extreme cases.) They become ardent defenders and practitioners of their faith and honestly, largely fearful, and that's exactly what I did.

And I thought that's what Catholicism and Christianity were - yes, the message of the gospel, but a very traditional, conservative, solid, and orthodox system. I wanted to be a good, rule following, unquestioning, conservative Catholic because that's exactly the image of God I had. God was a religious conservative, even if not a political one.

And then I was introduced to views that undermine that religiously conservative God. These voices from the religious left (or "liberal" or "progressive" or whatever language you wish to use) were so appealing not because they cleverly spun lies but because they contained a lot of truth. They weren't so concerned with how often you attended mass or if you identified with all of the Church's teachings like a good Catholic. They were more concerned with the mystical, the level of spiritual awareness, the experiential informing your faith.

In France's parliament in previous times, on the right would sit the nobility and the clergy - those with power, and privelege. On the left sat representatives of the common people. The dynamic isn't extremely pertinent for my own story but it informs our notions still - the right wanting to maintain the status quo, the left wanting to throw it out altogether. By the way, Richard Rohr remarks, "What on earth were the clergy doing on the right!"

Most converts and religious conservatives really fear liberal beliefs and even the mere "liberal" language. I did for a long time but eventually I experienced a second, smaller conversion and swung my pendulum the other way, toward the far left. How many times do we do that, going between two extremes of desire or thought? I've "lived" in the left for a while in the past year, where I found a mystical and honestly much more loving and merciful God, only to realize that this liberal view is another face of God but it is not the totality of God.

The danger with the religious left, that I've found, is a casting out of revelation, rules, and law in favor of novelty and too often individual interpretations. The left wants a God who doesn't care about the rules but who also can be made anew and understood apart from tradition (lowercase "t"). But this is recreating God in human form just as much as the conservative image has. There are great dangers from these views and there are great necessities for them as well, which is why God gave them to us.

And I think God knows the different faces we'll see. If we look at the totality of right and left together, we can see that it's completely unimportant to judge where people are on this spectrum. It is important to note the strengths and shortcomings of each. So is God on the right or left? Is the historical, the real, or the mystical Christ on either side? He is on both. And neither. It's okay to live with paradox. God is paradox! It's okay to see that this group has a lot of truth here and this other one has really found something there and to praise the different aspects of God while guarding against those untrue characteristics that right and left ideologies impose on the Divine.

I think neither right nor left is perfect yet both recognize something of Perfection. And the Catholic Church is big enough for both. And so is Christianity. And it's no surprise that so is God. God overcomes our labels and exists on all planes.

I Don't Get It

Allow me the liberty of a harmless rant. These are things that I've thought about and really, just don't get. Other people seem to not notice but I hope this isn't true. Maybe, like me, you're a closet ranter and you've just been waiting for someone to articulate these issues. In the interest of honesty, this is completely inspired by my friend Richelle's earlier and quite brilliant rant found here. Without further adieu... People who communicate with their significant other via social media. Really? You can’t text or, I don’t know, talk to them in person? You just thought the best way to say “I love you” was on Facebook? You wanted to thank your girlfriend for being in your life by sending her a tweet? Come on. Just post “look at me, everybody” and at least some people will respect your honesty.

The overuse of the word “passion” and all its derivations. Actually this one I do understand, I just don’t like it. Who knows how many drafts of cover letters/resumes I had to clutter with this word because every job wants you to be passionate! But come on, this has limits. If your life was changed by Cancer Treatment Centers of America you probably are passionate about it. If your job is to blog for the office of tourism, you probably don’t really have a passion for “finding great deals for out of town guests” (actual listed ‘passion’ for a Chicago blogger). How could that be anyone’s passion?

Urine pools under the urinal. Guys know exactly what I’m talking about. Who’s the neanderthal who can’t hit a 180 degree target from an inch away? Without fail you walk into the bathroom & see a puddle under every urinal there. Come on, guys. So the trick becomes to pick out the vacant one with the least amount of pee in the area where your shoes will be. Revelation to women: never touch the bottom of a guy’s shoes.

Tyra Banks. Oh, she’s so proud, so insightful, so progressive in promoting women’s issues. No, she’s really just a gorgeous person who got her own talk show after she couldn’t model anymore and now she pawns off universally made observations as revelatory. Gasp! You mean advertisements depict an image of feminine beauty that’s horribly unrealistic and it’s a bad thing for girls? I’m glad you noticed. You only profited from that industry, oh, I guess your entire life.

People who constantly praise drinking. We get it, you like the sauce. Your tenth comment about your love affair with alcohol isn’t hilarious. No, you’re not “just so much fun” for wanting every social gathering to feature heavy drinking. It’s called borderline alcoholism and it stopped being funny with the end of college. Maybe even sooner.

Multiple “Honeymoons”. There is one honeymoon per marriage! I suppose I can understand calling something a “second honeymoon” just to connote the purpose of the trip but only if the couple in question has been married for a good while, say, at least 15 years. Third or fourth honeymoon? What the hell is that? I recently saw someone my age - 25 and only married for a few years - declare that they were on their third honeymoon. After your first (and only) honeymoon, you know what that’s called? A vacation. People take them all the time. And they take them with their significant others. You’re not more passionate, special or loving than anyone else. Vacations are special enough. Stop with this “honeymoon” business.

People who “Like” Wal-Mart on Facebook. Seriously? Just...why? It’s a horrible company. I know people like to save money; that’s pretty universal. But by shopping there all the time and by liking their page, you’re endorsing everything they do and you’re voting against all of their competitors. I used to work at a Barnes & Noble. People would complain all the time about the price differences: “They have The Help for cheaper at Wal-Mart.” Yeah, and have you noticed any differences in our stores? We have carpet. People actually do customer service here. The store is clean and friendly, and our part-time workers get benefits. Sorry if that costs you an extra dollar on your book. But if you actually want every store to eventually look and act like Wal-Mart then always shopping there is definitely the way to go.

Mops. I don’t think they’re doing anything.

Duck Hunt for Nintendo. This is the only confirmed case of actual magic in human history. How else could it work? Amazing! But incomprehensible.

The rising price of higher education. Granted, I don’t know the intricacies of this. But I know that at the private, Christian, liberal arts college I attended in Michigan, the cost grew a couple thousand just in my time there. It was one of the most expensive colleges in the state, which I honestly couldn’t have afforded without assistance. I had a great time and absolutely loved all of the concerts, events, new academic buildings and dorms, athletic facilities, etc. that I got to use for free. But was it really necessary? And are these really to entice students? It seems to be a very bad pattern of rising tuition to cover campus projects, which are done to attract students who have to pay higher tuition to cover campus projects, and on and on. Something really has to be done.
Did I miss anything? What would you add to the list? Leave a comment!